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Thread: The best way to pass a piss test.

  1. #1
    Dave Walker is offline Registered
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    Jun-25-2005
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    3

    The best way to pass a piss test.

    I am a moderate smoker with a low body fat ratio, (remember thc is fat soluble). The less body fat you have the easier it is to quickly eliminate the residue.A person with a high fat ratio would need 30 days or more to eliminate. So fat content is one of the most important issues. It is about manipulating your body's fat cells.
    I read years ago that excersize, weight lifting, running etc. to the point of sweating profusely speeds the body's metabolic rate 2000% and no other method works as effectively to truly eliminate thc residue from fat cells. I have relied on this method 5 seperate times without any problem. I stop smoking 2-3 days before testing, (this is my own time frame). I Excersise intensely, and drink plently of water. Do not fast, contrary to thought eating speeds metabolism. If you fast the body goes into storage mode.
    On the morning of the test I get up early and start drinking and urinating at least 5 times. Don't drink tons of water throughout the night, this does nothing but makes you nausiated, and causes you to lose sleep, you cannot dilute fat cells with water to remove thc, once again thc is fat soluble not water soluble. A glass of water before bed is fine.
    Your first pee in the morning will have the highest concentration of remaining residue. On my last drink, a few hours before the test, I eat a multivitamin to ad color and drink a little milk and juice and have something to eat to throw off the specific gravity measure of the test, to those that dont know about specific gravity, in short they are testing the amount of dissolved solids in your urine, If your full of water you will fail. NEVER give your first pee of the day to the test as this will have the highest concentration of remaining residue. Also the sample that you do give should come from the last remaining 1/4 of fluid in the body as this will have least amount of remaining residue that the fat cells are eliminating.
    If you are not able to stop smoking or have a moderate to high fat ratio I suggest using real dehydrated powdered human urine. I have used this method also on a random test. I buy from ureasample.com, comes with armpit i.v. bag and micro tube with valve. and two bags of powdered dehydrated human urine which you can carry and mix instantly.Keep an eye on temperature. 90-98.6 degrees is what it must come out as. I keep the i.v. bag duct taped to the warm part of the body, (under armpit) to keep temp stable and put on a sweater or something similiar to keep the upper torso really warm. I have bought twice from this company and gave their sample with no problems at all.
    So the idea is to have a couple of methods at your disposal depending on the time frame of the test. I used to stress out on these tests.
    Never use any type of additive, ever, this is one time where I did get nailed. I used a popular product from a company.The medical review officer called me and said "There is no way you could have this much salt in your body, you would be dead."What could I tell him? Never use additives. Hope this helps.

    Dave.

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  3. #2
    DazzleMe is offline Registered
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    Jun-06-2005
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    14
    dave youre a genius! i totally agree with all you've said! i dont have a high fat ratio but im not a stick either! my first test i took was last week and i did the whole lose sleep thing and drank 2 n a half gallons of water.. WHAT A WASTE! by the time i had to get up i couldnt even lay down straight! anyway after it was 2 weeks of not smoking and i had to take my test (yesterday actually) i just ate a bunch the night before.. woke up peed ate a normal meal peed again drank a little and went took the test! my pee was still soo clear so im scared about that but.. we'll see! anyways i think you'll definitely be a big help to lots of kids! thanks

  4. #3
    Calliesmokes2's Avatar
    Calliesmokes2 is offline Registered+
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    Jun-27-2005
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    104
    Quote Originally Posted by Dave Walker
    I am a moderate smoker with a low body fat ratio, (remember thc is fat soluble). The less body fat you have the easier it is to quickly eliminate the residue.A person with a high fat ratio would need 30 days or more to eliminate. So fat content is one of the most important issues. It is about manipulating your body's fat cells.
    I read years ago that excersize, weight lifting, running etc. to the point of sweating profusely speeds the body's metabolic rate 2000% and no other method works as effectively to truly eliminate thc residue from fat cells. I have relied on this method 5 seperate times without any problem. I stop smoking 2-3 days before testing, (this is my own time frame). I Excersise intensely, and drink plently of water. Do not fast, contrary to thought eating speeds metabolism. If you fast the body goes into storage mode.
    On the morning of the test I get up early and start drinking and urinating at least 5 times. Don't drink tons of water throughout the night, this does nothing but makes you nausiated, and causes you to lose sleep, you cannot dilute fat cells with water to remove thc, once again thc is fat soluble not water soluble. A glass of water before bed is fine.
    Your first pee in the morning will have the highest concentration of remaining residue. On my last drink, a few hours before the test, I eat a multivitamin to ad color and drink a little milk and juice and have something to eat to throw off the specific gravity measure of the test, to those that dont know about specific gravity, in short they are testing the amount of dissolved solids in your urine, If your full of water you will fail. NEVER give your first pee of the day to the test as this will have the highest concentration of remaining residue. Also the sample that you do give should come from the last remaining 1/4 of fluid in the body as this will have least amount of remaining residue that the fat cells are eliminating.
    If you are not able to stop smoking or have a moderate to high fat ratio I suggest using real dehydrated powdered human urine. I have used this method also on a random test. I buy from ureasample.com, comes with armpit i.v. bag and micro tube with valve. and two bags of powdered dehydrated human urine which you can carry and mix instantly.Keep an eye on temperature. 90-98.6 degrees is what it must come out as. I keep the i.v. bag duct taped to the warm part of the body, (under armpit) to keep temp stable and put on a sweater or something similiar to keep the upper torso really warm. I have bought twice from this company and gave their sample with no problems at all.
    So the idea is to have a couple of methods at your disposal depending on the time frame of the test. I used to stress out on these tests.
    Never use any type of additive, ever, this is one time where I did get nailed. I used a popular product from a company.The medical review officer called me and said "There is no way you could have this much salt in your body, you would be dead."What could I tell him? Never use additives. Hope this helps.

    Dave.
    Do you really think this could work for me! I mean I could deal with not smoking maybe 2 days before my test but everyone I've talked to says you need like at least 2 weeks. My other problem is I couldnt do that fake urine thing cuz they have someone watch us pee. I mean how humiliating is that. Thanks for postin this though, it gives me somethin else to think about anyway.
    Callie

    So go snort your loved white powder
    I'll just play my music louder
    And get my drugs from the counter at the pharmacy

    Whore, fuck your drugs
    I introduced you anyway
    You're a slave
    Spun undone, I met you in an alleyway
    And I'm never okay

  5. #4
    AcidFreak's Avatar
    AcidFreak is offline Registered+
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    Jun-19-2005
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    522

    Drug test tomorrow...

    oops
    Quote Originally Posted by aparadis
    I just soaked my dick in clorox bleach to pass a piss test. Hurts like hell. How long will this last? And how well does this work?
    Hey hey hey...smoke weed every day

  6. #5
    chodedatoad is offline Registered
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    Jul-10-2005
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    16
    callie, it don't matter if you have tests where they watch you, so far i've had like 7 tests, haven't taken one of them myself. And i heard that some women put the piss in a condom and put the condom up their vagina and just poke a hole in it with a sharp fingernail.

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